JOGJA

hey people! I have no idea whether anybody actually reads my lame blog but whatevs la, asalkan ada tempat utk curhat (curahan hati) hahahaha! anyway, more of Syaza's misadventures in JOGJA aye?

yesterday, i had a freakish accident. spoiler siots, dah la my last few days in Jogja ARGHHH! I fell of the bus while alighting. best kan! *satu tepukan gemuruh buat Syaza* the bus system here mmg mcm anak suar, the buses don't stop fully so you kinda have to 'jump' off if you wanna alight. and people here have a certain technique of getting off a bus, you have to step off with your left foot. so being awesomely amazing lah kan i conveniently forgot the technique though my friends have reminded me time and again (I tgn shiok melayan lagu "My Life Would Suck Without You" while thinking of my last few days here" and dengan confidentnya, i stepped off with my right foot. step macam faham physical laws here, moving bus + stepping off with right foot resulted in me popping my right ankle and jatuh terjelepok pas-pas kat depan a hotel. Great move Syaza! Skrg ni bus sialan baru nak stop tau, tgk aku terus jalan lg! The sial bus driver and conductor didn't even bother to help me or ask me if I was okay. Sakitnya serious buay tahan lor! Mujurlah aku tak terguling2 or what or else I would have rolled myself to the nearest shop, bought a razer and slit my wrists. Malu shiak! The satpams at the hotel came running to my aid and the only thing I could say when they helped me up and asked me if I was okay was "Saya kaget...saya kaget.." Kan fantastic tu, dah la dasar budak bandar tak reti teknik2 nak turun bus, aku lagi menunjukkan bakatku menganalisa situasi. Tapi aku rasa si pak-pak satpam tu lagi kaget tgk aku mcm rape victim kena dump by the roadside HAHAHAHAHA! okay tak kelakar.

so ye alh, terjadilah satu drama pagi2 ye... my teachers suma dah panic gila, ingat aku kena langgar mobil ke pe,and when they came to pick me up from the satpam post (yes, aku sempat tangkap glamour kat sana, duduk kat tempat pak satpam, join obrolan2) the only thing I could do was...laugh. I don't know I just found the situation so funny and typical of Syaza's bimboness. Diorang yang panic giler tgk aku nyer ankle dah ter-pop out aku cuma boleh ketawa. Mintak kena sepak like please. So yeah, loads of drama with them having to bring me to the clinic and later to a tukang urut where my foot was sprayed with horse pee (serious tak bedek. UTTER GROSSNESS!!!!) yang pedih nak mampus it felt like my tits was being chewed off in a totally non-pleasurizing kinda way.

untuk orang2 yang normal yang kalau kakinya copot dan jalan tempang2, will definitely do the smart thing and get proper rest. tapi aku being awesomely aku, I will be going to Borobudur to celebrate Weisak later. AHHHHH SO EXCITED!!! I'll be camping out at a friend's friend place tonight so we can see the ceremony from morning, and end it off with the lighted float ceremony on friday night. OMG OMG SERIOUS CANNOT WAIT! yes I will attempt to climb all the way up to the peak of Borobudur with my kaki yang copot. This is called dedication people, dedicated to be foolhardy in the name of fun woooo!

I've been spending most of my free time with Mas2 kat sebelah rumah. Dari diorang bawak aku tgk an unrehearsed jazz concert (aku ada amik videonya kekek siots), jalan2 kat monuments2 ard Ygy tgh malam, hang out kat luar bilik diorang nyanyi2 and berbual konek, keliling kota nak makan gudeg nyer pasal at 3 am. Yes, I'm having a blast here and because of them and my teachers in school, I KNOW my floodgates will open on Tuesday when I will fly back home (Understand why Kelly Clarkson's MLWSWY is on replay?). Haishes. On  the other hand I miss you all, my English-laden life back home and MOST IMPORTANTLY buses which stop at PROPER bus stops FULLY.

Pardon me but in Singapore tak de teknik2 nak turun bus. Cuma tap ezlink je nyeahahah!

Okay I shall write another time then. While typing this, I managed to spill a cup of water all over the office printer. YOU ARE SERIOUSLY AMAZING SYAZA.

JOGJA 2!

Hey people… I miss you guys A LOT! Though I’m having a good time here experiencing the culture and people, I miss the fact that you guys are a (cheap) call away, that the food there has belacan ( my first complain about Indonesia, NO BELACAN MATI GUE haha!) and I can speak English freely (Siak, its hard saying everything in BI. It’s hard not to be able to lapse into English as and when I want to) I’m gonna try keep this short cus I’m going to Prambanan tmr so I need to sleep soon (its 12 am btw).


Let’s see, where do I start? School’s been fun, I really enjoy my one on one lesson with my tutors, discussing and exchanging ideas about our cultures and stuff. My friends in school are mostly my tutors cus it’s a small department and my schedule is really packed so I don’t really have time to merambu and make friends with the students. This morning I had dance class. I realize I AM SO NOT MALAY-DANCE INCLINED! All the lemah gemalai crap, yeah, I can’t do. My dance capabilities are limited to grinding, gelek-ing and bopping. I asked Mas Endru to help take some photos of me learning Tarian Puspita (it’s a kind of dance from Yogya) and in every single photo, I am not in sequence with the dance teacher. Astaga, kesialan beneran. Oh well.

I had kelas membuat jamu after that, GEREK KE PE! Best aku meramas kunyit, kencur dan segala macam rempah yang lain and step menumbuk and menggiling the stuff. My hands are a sick yellow colour from the jamu –making class hahaha! But I succeeded in making jamu kunyit asem and beras kencur, for glowing, smooth skin and to tambah darah respectively. It’s not bitter uh so dengan bestnyer aku meneguk beberapa gelas nyahahahah!

After that, I went to my homestay family ’s event. The daughter had her convocation today so their extended family had a get-together at one of their relatives’ house to celebrate her graduation. Makanan gerek beb! They even got a proper bakso seller to bring his cart (yang untuk jual bakso tu). ENAK BANGET SIIHHH! My homestay mum invited the guys from the hostel to join us *muka gembira, tapi maintain* I’m friends with them already hehehe. A couple of them are pretty cute *maintain Syaza maintain*

So jengjengjeng… MEN + Syaza . What do you think happened? When I got home, I went over cus I needed (step betul je’needed’ Syaza) a ride to the bookshop (more like borong actually. I burnt a major hole in my pocket cus I bought 10 books. Mampus. But then again I will have all the books in the world to read this hols yay!) I went to Mas Anton’s room first cus he’s the first guy I was introduced to at the men’s hostel tapi dia tidur aiseyman. Lantas aku macam kebingungan uh nak buat apa. Takkan nak menjerit “MAAAAASSSSS! Mas mana yang bisa nganterin gw ke toko buku siih?!” Kan macam anak suar tu. Nanti Mas Selamat yang datang ‘save’ aku *HAHAHA double entendre! Okay yang tak faham tak pe, aku dah best ketawa sendiri pun*

I decided to walk along the whole row and jenguk2 dalam bilik diorang uh. Most of them tutup pintu or bilik diorang gelap so I thought diorang keluar or what uh. Skali ada ni budak uh, one of the cute ones, ngan tgk tv ke main computer ke melancap ke god knows la. So dgn suara yang centil dan kegenitan membara aku pun tanya uh “Mas, malam ni ada acara ga? Saya mau ke toko buku, bisa dihantarin siih?” Melihat kemampatan aku yang terhingga (yes Syaza, but of course) of course la si mamat tu agree hahaha! I agreed to meet him like 1 hr plus later so aku boleh rehat+mandi+solat wtv la eh). Bila aku turun kan, aiseyman mamat dah mandi uh, dah sachok gila, baju smart, rambut basah, bau wangi (dia mandi minyak wangi agaknya uh. But it was a nice smell hehehehe *ketawa gatal*) Aku pun membonceng kapcainya bak mat and minah rempit. But not before kita kena kacau rabak dengan the other guys. The only thing I could say to the guys were “Aduhh siih Mas, saya cuman mau dihanteriin ke toko buku kok. Bukan nge-date!!! Mas bisa ikut kok kalau mau” As usual, aku tersenyum malu tersipu-sipu bak wanita Melayu terakhir while saying all that uh. Mentel nak mampus…astaga. Dari gi kedai buku, kita dah melencong pergi tah mana ceruk Yogya dah before having dinner. Kira2 balik, aku spent hampir 4 jam ngan si mamat cute tu. (Aku tak tau kenapa aku senyum kalahkan kerang busuk bila tulis ni entry. Okay fine, aku tau kenapa cuma tak nak admit) He’s 21, Muslim, berasal dari Jkt, now studying Mechanical Engineering at UGM. And cute. Very cute.

Okay enough of Mas Baik Hati. I promised you guys I will tell you some of the misadventures I have had here kan? Well, a couple of days ago I started receiving phonecalls and sms-es from an unknown person kata nak mintak berkenalan. Okay, itchy dick aside, WHO ARE YOU DUDE AND HOW IN THE NAME OF GANESH’S ARMPIT DID YOU GET MY INDO NUMBER?! At that time I just got my number seyh so I only gave it to my tutors. Aku cuma reply sekali uh kata aku not interested but he was so persistent, bilang aku nama dia la(Agung)entah apa la. Asal, saiz bola tak nak bilang ke pe? Kental uh nak berkenalan thru sms cam gini. He finally admitted that he took down my number when I went to buy the sim card. CB! Tak ada customer confidentiality at all. He kept sms-ing and asking why I nvr reply sampai aku dah tak le angz uh. I went over to the hostel and the first guy I saw was Mas Anton. Aku mintak tolong Mas Anton call ni anak sundal and tell him off uh, kata dia BF aku or what. Mas Anton call pakai number aku, si shialan tu angkat and put down when he heard a guy’s voice. Mas Anton called him again and maki hamun dia and alhamdullillah, si sialan tu dah tak susahkan hidup aku lagi.



So yes. Itu antara many. Nanti aku tulis lagi la kalau tak ada aral.

P.S // I called my parents and told them I was learning Javanese too. And my dad said “Oh nenek kau pandai cakap Jawa. Mak dia orang Jawa dari Indonesia pe “ WTF MOMENT. Sesungguhnya aku tak pernah tau. You never told me we have Javanese blood Ayah! SHINGZ.

HAAAALLLLPPPP!

Ish I can't seem to upload my blog post about Jogja. irritetek betul uh. Does anyone know how come I can't upload my word document on to blogger. Help people!

Anyway, I am now in school. My driver keeps coming really early, semalam 7.40, hari ni 7.30. Padahal class aku start pukul 8.30 tau and its only like a 5-10 mins drive from home. After school, I'll be going shopping at Jalan Malioboro so yesss, time to stock up on the vintage goodies bebeh! haha! But again I shall try to upload my entry when I get home.

Really ngantuk. Slamatz.

JOGJA!

Hello priviledged few who actually know about the existence of this blog! Haha! At the time of writing this, its 8.30 pm in Jogja but I’ll only be uploading this in the morning when I reach campus cause I can’t seem to tap into the wireless here…BOO! I will have to ask my homestay family tomorrow to help me with it (you guys know how hopeless I am when it comes to this kinda things) but for now I have to make do with typing it out in Words and saving it in my thumbdrive. Sigh..


Okay so for the uninitiated, I am currently in Jogja to study Bahasa Indonesia (BI) as part of the BI Immersion Program for 3 weeks. And I am here all ALONE. Actually, the program is supposed to bring a group of students who are currently taking or have taken BI before to Indonesia so they can immerse themselves in the culture and improve their language skills with the native speakers but due to immense kentalness on the part of BI students, NO ONE EXCEPT ME EXPRESSED INTEREST. So technically, NUS couldn’t go on with the plan tapi memandangkan aku gatal dan semangat membara to get away this holiday, my Ibu (language teacher, in this case)told me that aku boleh guna cara gelap and go on with it myself. So a week before the exams (Yes, gatal to the max Syaza, exam tak nak concentrate, gi buat plan holiday dulu. Inilah dinamakan prioritization ye) aku dan Ibu bersekongkol bak ikan tongkol membuat plan and booked my flight here. And yes, three weeks later here I am, all alone step nak belajar BI yang sememangnya aku dah pro uh. Muahahaha! *ketawa purba*

So last Friday, I flew to Jogja. Aku dengan confifucknye meng-announce la kat FB yang aku nak sendoff party yang kalahkan rombongan haji but as usual, like all of Syaza’s confifuck plans, they never come true. Ye lah, siapalah aku, insan yang kerdil bak melukut di tepi gantang bukan Miss Popularity huhuhu. WHATEVERRR la eh. On the day itself my sendoff party at the airport mak dan bapak aku je. *meh semua, aksi ketawakan Syaza!* HAHAHAHA! Actually Fizah and Izwan wanted to meet me at the airport but both woke up late (HAHA dasar starkarat kita tiga) so Fizah couldn’t make it but Izwan did rush to the airport to send me off. Ini yang part best uh, I have to share this with the world (Haha sorry Izwan, tapi kita dah mendiskusi dan ketawa tak terhingga pasal benda ni so kirakan okay la eh? Haha!) But before that, meh aku bilang macam mana salam terakhir aku ngan mak bapak aku. Aku dah psyche myself up for aksi menangis, peluk sampai guling2 macam Indian bride kena give away by her parents uh but AS USUAL, it was nothing like how I imagined. So tak drama! Disappointed aku! Aku nak jugak la aksi drama hengat, biar puas hati aku. Ye la, I was expecting my mum to go all drama on me, go “ANAKKU!!!!!” and rangkul me or what (which, if you know me well enough, you would be aware that is standard mak-Syaza-in-distressing-moments line) but mak aku setakat peluk aku,cium aku bila aku salam dia and pesan me to jaga diri, jangan lupa solat etc. Bapak aku pun cam gitu. Tak best seyh. I will never admit it to my mum but I actually enjoy uh her drama moments, I look back and get very amused nyeahahaha!

So when they chao already (tak look back even once seyh. Mintak kena hantar senior citizen’s home betul. Haha!) aku pun dengan ghairahnya meng-check in luggage ku. Best ke pe, suitcase aku berat 19 kg. nyeahahaha! Tak sia2 aku opt for extra baggage, 20 kg bila pergi 30 kg bila balik. Ish entah berapa banyak Huang Na aku boleh sumbat dalam suitcase aku. Okay, jahat dia pun sudah almarhumah. Anyways, I was waiting for Izwan to reach the airport la. A MESSAGE TO IZWAN: Kau nyer lambat legendary sak beb, kalahkan mak bonda. HAHA! But in any case, aku berterima kasih dan syukur sesyukur-syukurnya ada kau yang sanggup nak hantar aku. Yang penting niat ada eh? Haha!) Thank you to Nashe, Ama, Ili, Shafi, Fizah and Hatib who teman-ed me in the meantime through their texts and calls. Your well-wishes are very much appreciated sayangs! Tak de la aku rasa macam anak kurang kasih sayang haha! Aku pun bak mat di bawah block melepak-lepak di sekitar lapangan terbang itu menunggu si mak bonda tu. Aku duduk dekat dengan the board uh so I can see my flight timing, bila the gate opened Izwan was a couple of bus stops away only so aku pun continue rilek-rilek uh. Alangkah sialnyer, tup tup aku tgk board keparat tu dah last call. Cb panic sak! Terus aku lincah kadut, gi lari masuk. Just when I lepas, Izwan called saying he dah sampai. ARGHHHHH selisih!!! Aku dah by then lari setengah mampus pergi gate aku, sial nyer gate jauh giler. Sampai dengan tak glamour ye, panting, lutut dah mcm nak give way. Ada jugak la adegan macam “Ada Apa Dengan Cinta”, where Cinta ran like a bitch to say goodbye to Rangga at the airport yg ada steamy kiss scene tu( sebenarnya tidak steamy sangat la). Tapi memandangkan ini Singapore where immigration rules are strict and the roles were reversed, perkara sebegitu tak la terjadi. Cuma sempat berbual kat telephone je. Tapi mujurlah ya, diberi kesempatan buat aku dan Izwan to whisper madah pujangga cinta (that’s ‘sweet nothings’ for the non-Malay inclined) dan bermesra sebelum aku pergi. (Actually tak uh, we were both laughing tak maintain at our utter kesialan) ((Actually aku lagi sial la nak kena tulis benda dalam brackets, step monologue dalaman, but you all dah tau aku ni ada sedikit bipolar dan suka berbual sendiri di samping menghidupkan berbagai-bagai watak berbeda))

So when I arrived, I was met at the airport by two student teachers, Mbak Ayu and Mas Endru to bring me to my homestay. I am really enjoying my stay here. It would be amazing if I could upload some pictures to show you guys how it is at my homestay but yeah internet is a bit iffy here cus my homestay tak de internet. Oh there is a wireless connection here, I guess it belongs to one of the guys staying at the men’s hostel beside my house (Yes a men’s hostel. There are 12 of them! Envious girls? Haha!) and the network is called “pakarfuckfest”. HAHAHAHAHA! Macam paham ni wak kang. Entah2 ni cewe Singapur boleh give them a tip or two HAHAHA! *ketawa yang tak ikhlas* oh and I haven’t got the time to take the pictures yet cus my free time is usually at night and at night aku takut siket nak amik gambar, tah nanti apa je yang menjelma dalam camera aku. Oh and yeah I stay on the second floor and I have it all to myself. AWESOMENESSS! And I have my own bathroom too. My room overlooks the roofs of the houses around my area, not a pretty sight but I am enjoying the fact that I can bergayut sorang2 kat sini. Ish Syaza, bergayut eh. Choice of words sungguh tak jaga2.

On Saturday, I had my placement test dan aku yang sudah sememangnya pro, was put in level Advanced 2. *chuffed*. Oh yeah an update, after today, my first proper day at school my tutors (Its one on one for me btw. I’m alone quite a lot here huh? Kawan –kawan aku semua tutors kat sini. HAHAHA!) are considering on revising my syllabus, they think I am wrong for this course (which is to learn the language) and moving me to private lessons of Indonesian literature under the Dean. YES BEBEH! Tak sia2 aku nonton sinetron and dengar dangdut haha! I managed to catch a play entitled “The Bounty”, put up by the final year English Lit students at my University (Universitas Sanata Dharma). Not bad effort but I had to strain to listen to what they were saying cus their accents are so strong. I caught the “Fuck!” and “Goddamn it!” parts tho. Yes, what’s new la kan.

On Sunday, I went to a fair at Universitas Gadjah Madah and later I went to Makam Raja2 Mataram in Kotagede. Scary or what, the makam is really dark with 987879890 tombs packed in it. The walking space between each tomb is like what 10 cm? But the tour was really very interesting! I envy Indonesians man, they have such a rich culture. Oh and I had to wear the traditional Javanese costume which means kain sarong, and another piece of cloth, worn like a tube top. Sexy sak. Mana tak raja Jawa byk isteri and gundik. I had to keep tugging at my top so as to not expose my girls to the world. ish ish.

So yeah, that’s basically it for now. I brought my Sangam and Ibu Mertuaku vcd here for company but for some strange reason I really wanna watch Adnan Sempit on youtube again. Damn internet! I have managed to get up to a couple of misadventures here but I will tell it to you guys next entry aye! Its already dark (its only 6 here btw) and I’m kinda hungry so I wanna go home and eat dinner. Email me you guys, I get a kick reading your emails. Reminds me of home :D

Slamatz!

Jiwang

okay I shall type out a quick post before I have t0 go for class. which starts in 5 mins so fly fingers fly!

so today my driver, (Yes I have a personal chaffeur here, amazing or WHUTTT. WHOO! Ada Pak Sopir dunkk!) came like really early. He's supposed to pick me up at 8 but he came at 7.40 instead and I didn't even have time to have breakfast *kecewa yang teramat sangat* so I had to have breakfast at one of the waroengs near campus. And guess what? Lagu jiwang was playing on the radio! I got all teary-eyed listening to Spoon's "Rindu Serindunya". Kental or what. But ye la, aku kan sorang kat sini so any reminder of home is welcome.

Okay I better go now. Mas Endru (one of my tutors) is probably waiting for me. I shall upload my panjang nak mampus post later when I get home and can go to the internet cafe or sth. Have fun you guys!

malay style

sesungguhnya aku teramat la perangai melayu malas, i started this blog in what?- july 2009 and baru sekarang tergerak hati nak tulis lagi. bak pepatah melayu, "Hangat-hangat tahi ayam" or loosely translated, "hot-hot chicken shit". the analogy behind this idiom is well, chicken shit is hot once it is excreted but the heat is fleeting and is used to explain someone who has a great, amazing idea to do sth but never gets around to properly doing it and the interest slowly dies off. the malay language is amazing when it comes to coming up with these kinda things but to urbanites like us who don't have the time, access and tolerance to chicken shit, these kinda things are kinda hard to grasp. i have effectively wasted 2 minutes of your life musing about chicken shit.

anyway, I hope to utilize this blog in the coming weeks. Keyword: Hope. As usual, the hot-hot chicken shit syndrome may just hit me again and I will go back to being a lazy Malay. Sigh, sorry Dr Syed Hussein Alatas, I am not doing much to prove that it is just a myth, in fact I am perpetuating it more and more. Istighfars. So yeah, watch out for this space :D

New Haircut

Hi All! I know I look emo. But whatever. This was a product of umm, extreme boredom, and good friendship. My friend was bored and quite sad, so I allowed her to cut my hair. Yes, I'm a very good friend like that. And, I'm not the sort to regret because it's just hair. :P 

YEAYY!